We must put ourselves first in order to live at our capacity and be the best versions of ourselves. You can read all of the books, take all of the courses, have all of the coaches and mentors but at the end of the day… it is up to YOU to take full responsibility for your life and create the inner shift.
Yes all of those things are definitely helpful but only YOU can do the work and create the real change.
Over my 28 years, I’ve learnt that through self-study, reflection and self enquiry, mindful movement, meditation, intuitive eating and cultivating an unconditional compassionate relationship with yourself is the path to optimal health & wellness and putting yourself first.
You have the choice to go through life unaware of how you act, react, consume and exchange your energy but what would be the purpose of you being on this earth to have a human experience?
We are born to learn, grow and evolve, so why not choose to enjoy life and feel good while contributing and creating positive change to the world.
Self study, learning about yourself, your habits and patterns is probably one of the most exciting and interesting things because there is NO one out there like you. Taking time to self reflect on a regular basis not only leads to a deeper relationship with yourself but it creates space for you to get clear on your intentions and desires.
2. Mindful Movement.
I saw exercise as the way lose weight. I have done a lot of work on my self worth and body image because I’ve struggled with the belief that I must be thin to be accepted and love. So in order to be thin, I had to exercise. I moved my body out of fear, of being fat.
This mindset created even more lack, where nothing was ever good enough. Mindful movement involves setting a positive intention behind the activity. Knowing your WHY behind exercise will seriously help you move in a way that feels good. Mindful movement is your way of moving your body that doesn’t feel like a chore. For me it’s a walk in nature, dance or yoga.
At first I thought meditation was about getting rid of all my thoughts which felt unrealistic. It felt like more of a “have to” rather than a want which is when I found visualisation and guided meditations something I really connected to.
Meditation is something I can easily avoid. I can usually think of 1000 things to do before actually meditate and that’s when I know I should be meditating. For me, meditation slows down everything & quietens my monkey mind, I feel much clearer, inspired and creative.
I have to remind myself all the time, it’s not about conquering the thoughts, it’s purely noticing what is.
4. Intuitive Eating.
One of the most liberating feeling is knowing that you can enjoy your body and the experiences that come along with it. I believe in the no-diet diet, that works for me as it is not my goal to lose weight, gain muscle or weight. My goal is to work towards and unconditional love and compassion towards my body and allow myself to enjoy life which includes FOOD and EXERCISE.
Living by the no diet-diet has allowed me to deepen my relationship with food, exercise and my body. Although at times I find myself disconnected from my body and mindlessly eating whatever I want whenever I want, I learn from the experience that usually it has nothing to do with craving food.
When I find myself saying “you shouldn’t have eaten all of that….” Or “Don’t eat that, it’s bad” , I give myself permission to eat the food and most importantly ENJOY IT so I don’t spend half a day feeling guilty & angry at myself.
5. Compassion and Forgivness.
Some days are always going to be better than others. That’s just the way life goes. In this case, the purpose of a daily practice is not to reach perfection, but is to prepare you for the darker and tougher times. Daily compassion and forgiveness is probably the hardest yet most rewarding ways to live a happier and fulfilling life. It’s so easily forgotten because we aren’t really taught to forgive ourselves. If you are asking yourself “why am I not happy”, “why is she so happy”, "Why can’t I be as happy as…” - see it as a window to deeper learning rather than play the victim.
Through practicing self compassion and forgiveness, I have been able to soften in areas where I believed I had to be strong. I realised that softening doesn’t always equal weakness, softening can equal strength. I see myself in those who think they need to be the strong and independent to prove their worth or their place in the world. It’s no longer about proving ourselves in a man’s world, it’s about finding a true balance between masculine and feminine qualities within, whether your a man or a woman.